JACOB and Rachael

It was a rift; deep as a chasmn, wide as the open mouth of the earth.

When her eyes returned, I felt sensations I could not explain. For just that moment, it seemed that I stood alone under the canopy. For a solitary moment, even now as I tell it, as I see it in my mind's eye, I feel, I see only one; me.

And now, again, the music was in my ears and the applause and the intimate laughter of family and friends as Laban concluded his blessing and prayer to God, saying,

"...in Thy name we ask of Thee..so be it."

" Heh, heh, heh." Laban laughed quietly to himself and smiled, as he walked back into the gaze of his own wife at their seats of honor.

Rachael was herself again. Maybe I was myself again, but the strangness disappeared into the night, overtaken by a stream of guests. So many had come to share in the love that enveloped us. This night was planned thick with celebration with me and Rachael, at the center of it all. We greeted our friends. We feasted on the roasted meats and sweet breads. We drank the wine of newly crushed grapes. Rachael stayed mostly among the large knot of women, lead by her mother and sisters. How they laughed and hugged and cried. They wailed some, too, for there was also a feeling of loosing, but sweeteneed with joy. The music praised Him and every cup we raised was meant to honor Him. We dutifully entertained under Laban's tents, our longings barely bridled, until at last we were alone.

She wanted it to be dark. My eyes wanted to see. The rose colored lips and apple cheeks. Long soft curls about her delicate round shoulders. But with slender arms and thin fingers she reached for the single lamp in my tent and put it out. Sitting close on our marriage bed she slowly let fall the marriage veil and in the darkness we became one.

But not one. It was the rift again, deep as a chasm; wide as the open mouth of the earth. We seemed to be in different places at the same time. I could not quite hear the same voice that had called to me in such passion. Her touch was muted; the feel of her just slightly cool. We wrestled with confusion.

"Rachael, is something wrong?" I asked.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I'll be better tomorrow."

And I believed her. I could wait until tomorrow.